“The battle with in me”

I feel like im limbo at the moment the dr just cant seem to get it right lately and everyday is constant battle. My health has not been great and testing me in every which way. Im tired of advocating for my self and trying to get better health care is proving alot harder.

With a new condition to add to the rest of the ever growing list, i  have multi auto immune syndrome this basically means i have auto immune dieases that attack the inside and outside so no where is safe, the latest is hasimotos and i thought this could not get any worst, i booked my self in for a massage along side my physio and turns out why my legs are weak and constant ache is there is fluid build up so i need to start lympatic massage to get the fluid moving and now it leaves me questioning do i have lupus and they have missed the signs or is because its hiding underneath everything else. Im lucky that both ladies are advocating for me and see this as real concern as they have concerns.

My days are lonley and each day is more unpredictable then the last and im not sure anymore what is going to happen. Im tapping into the altenative side i know i need to keep my body moving as much as it hurts or just to tired to.

My new health plan looks a bit like this:

  • Look into naturopath
  • Re assses my medication
  • Start taking much need vitamins
  • Keep things simple and rest
  • My week includes yoga and reformer pilates this will allow movment, rest, relax
  • Continue my Maori healing
  • At least one self care thing a week
  • Need a second opioion from a different dr
  • Plan my week and use my diary to ensure i dont get over loaded

I dont know what tommorow will bring so living in the moment and taking in the surroundings are my focus

Looking after my mental health has become so important and not allowing the triggers to over take and the constant feeling of been done as in i love to go back to the time where things were less complicated and i could socialise and not been in constant pain, the old me that could just jump in car and just drive, the old me that could do multiple things in day and not be drained after one task.

Shout to everyone who can relate or is feeling a bit lost, remember you are stronger then you think and keep moving forward.

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